In life, “nothing is wasted.” This is a truth I received from Laura Holland , the Communications Chair and my professor, when I returned to Oral Roberts University after a 20-plus years hiatus. While I had enjoyed varied levels of successes in my field, I returned to school feeling quite insecure that I hadn’t done it “the right way”. She consoled with her matter-of-fact statement, “Christie, nothing is wasted.” She further revealed that so much of what I learned in my life flow could and would be helpful in my return for I had lived a full life stocked with rich life and work experiences in communication and entertainment. As I dived back into school as a full-time, non-traditional student I saw over and over again how right she was!
I reflect on this today, from a more emotional place. From a place of love and relationships. I see that this truth that “nothing is wasted” can easily apply to a love life. Years of loving those who may not necessarily return the love to the same capacity can leave you famished, even emotionally bankrupt. Yet as I embarked this year on a deeper journey to love, resolving the old, and embracing the new’ I am so glad that I see that “nothing was wasted”. What I learned about myself in love relationships was that I possess an immense capacity to love (and be loved). I chose years ago to live deeply…so I had to learn to love deeply too. I AM deep, immensely so, AND I have a God-capacity to expand my love.
God once asked me years ago, while I was reeling emotionally, a very poignant question. “Christie, how much love can your heart hold and how much love can your heart give?” Now, if you’ve ever been asked a question by God, you know the Divine is seeking to show you something about yourself. I confess, I didn’t rush to answer those questions because I was preoccupied with drowning in my sorrows; but eventually the questions permeated my conscious and I had to face the truth.
Here goes… This heart of mine is boundless. Period. I have the capacity to HOLD and GIVE immense amounts of love. Infinite amounts of love. I also accepted the truth that if I ever tapped out of my personal supply of love that God was more than willing to allow His supply to flow into me and through me.
God sparked in me the desire and need to love past my ego and to no longer feel like I was “wasting my time” loving someone. The truth is … how could I ever waste time being like God … loving first … loving freely … loving without conditions. My friends, my professor was right … truly nothing, no life or love lesson, is wasted; which turns out to be quite a novel and freeing idea. #loveanyway #lovefreesthesoul #loveisGod